I’m getting back on the Tuesday Teaser bandwagon with a question: How do you react when you’re reading a novel and come across a word you don’t know? Are you annoyed? Are you thrilled? Do you reach for your dictionary with a grumble or a trill of excitement? Or do you just ignore it?
I ask, because the excerpt for today’s teaser was the source of a lot of disagreement in my writing group. Some members insisted that putting in a word that your average reader was unlikely to be familiar with was just WRONG. That was how they said it, like I was thinking of robbing a bank. Other members of my writing group countered with fond memories of books that taught them new vocabulary. Like me, they cited the work of Lemony Snicket as some of the best vocabulary-building children’s books out there.
Besides, they pointed out about my word choice: it’s the punchline. Without the word, the chapter isn’t as funny. Those opposed to strange words in their fiction countered that it wasn’t a punchline if you don’t know what it means. The lag time involving the dictionary would rob the chapter of its humor.
In the current draft, the punchline remains. I hope it will make it to print that way.
So, enjoy the teaser, and tell me in the comments how you feel about learning new words when you read a novel.
***
After a grueling day at my accountant’s office, looking at indecipherably occult spreadsheets, I drove by Meda’s house hopefully. I never would have done it, considering the embarrassment of her walking in on my act of self-pollution, except for that smile. Just as easily she could have been shocked or too appalled to speak, and I never would have stopped at her house. Her old Datsun sat in the yard, but I got no response when I rang the doorbell. I knocked loudly and a woman I’d never seen before came to the door. Her hair was still dark, but her face was lined and rough, like she had lived hard. Her sunken cheeks hinted at missing teeth. She looked at me strangely when I introduced myself, but she let me in.
Old Miss Amos was sitting in her usual spot and Annadore was in her playpen, arranging plastic farm animals and chewing contemplatively on a cow. For several uncomfortable moments, we were all quiet, and then the woman put out her hand.
“So, you’re Bernie Raleigh? I’m Muriel Amos. I’m Cathy’s–Meda’s mother.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Meda’s in the shower right now. She’ll be out in a little bit.” Muriel said it as though they’d been expecting me, so I sat down and waited.
“That’s Bernie Raleigh,” Meda’s grandmother said to Muriel. “He was abducted.”
“I know, Mom. I know that’s Mr. Raleigh. You interested in alien abduction?” Muriel took my uncertain shrug as an invitation to continue, leaning toward me over the coffee table. “You know a lot of people are starting to use hypnotism to find out they’ve been abducted. A lot of times the aliens will cause people to forget that they were taken. They suppress the memories. I remember my own experiences, and my mother has been able to since she had her stroke.”
“It’s like that whole part of my brain got opened up, where I had the memories hidden, since I had my stroke,” Miss Amos said, nodding to herself.
“I was just reading an article a friend of mine got off the Internet.” Muriel indicated some papers on the coffee table. “About this woman who got hypnotized as part of a program to stop smoking. While the doctor was hypnotizing her, she had a flashback of being abducted. The doctor never believed in it before, but he says after that, he thought it had to be real, because he did a bunch more sessions with her and she remembered all kinds of things. It turned out she’d been abducted like fourteen times.”
Down the hall, the sound of running water stopped.
“He’s here,” Muriel shouted.
At that same moment. I added up the intricate web of alien abductions and multiple Miss Amoses. Parthenogenesis.

Love the teaser
I learn new words by the context. And I have arguments with Word07 all the time about why words shouldn’t be considered “non-standard”
People need to learn somehow.
That was my reasoning for leaving in the odd words. How else will people get to know them? If you never hear or see a new word, how will you learn it? From a word-a-day calendar?
I’ve missed reading your writing so much.
You have that small-town weird America vibe sewn up beautifully.
LOL, Sue. I’m going to take that as a compliment…
Ditto Sue. God, yes, you certainly do.
And jaysus, the day I feel like learning a new word in a book is a distraction from the experience of reading is the day I’ll just give up trying to think about anything, ever.
Ah, my redneck soul sister.
Small town America is what I know. I’m just trying to stay off the Jerry Springer show.
What Sue and Amy said. Brilliant. And thanks! Now do I get to ignore my dictionary app “word of the day?”
Seriously. If we didn’t use words the average reader wouldn’t know, we’d all be writing on a sixth-grade level (that’s what they taught us in j-school back in the day, anyway). I started writing fiction so I could escape that.
Great teaser. I’m definitely intrigued. I agree with Sue. I love the vibe as well. It’s a mix of the odd, irreverant, meloncholy, and foreboding. My main suggestion is that we need to get a little more feel for who Bernie is. You sum up the other characters so easily so we get a feel for them, perhaps you could do the same for Bernie. Or is Bernie the “straight man” in a crazy world? As to the use of unfamiliar words, I’m all for it if it fits with the narrator. Here, as far as I can tell, it does.
Bernie thinks he’s the straight man. He’ll have his own crazy at a later time. Plenty of it.
And I’m glad to be among people who love a new exciting word hidden among old familiar ones.
We’re all word nerds.
I love me some word nerds. *snorple*
It’s just so perfectly voiced and atmosphered. Did I just make atmosphere into a verb? Yes. Yes, I did. Your fault.
I’m already hooked on who they people are what the hell is going on. Awesome.
From you I will permit the verbing of nouns.
Definitely loving the small town weird you’ve got going on – it’s hard to do it and make it feel real without it going all arch.
On unfamiliar words (since I’m a geek, this one wasn’t), there’s usually enough context to figure them out, and if not, if there’s a computer handy, I’ll look up. If not, I’ll probably just keep going.
Absolutely keep it this way. Honestly, I’ve taught myself English mostly by reading books and learning new words and I’m a huge defender if learning words in context. So yes, please, stick with it. And I also absolutely love the atmosphere and sheer weird vibe we’re gettin here. Awesome scene!
This definitely goes the job of being creepy and uncomfortable ( in a good way) I’m interested… and I love finding new words in fiction!